Friends come and go and come and go

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5 Mar

Written By Sylvia Jimenez

I hear the ping of the messages’ arrival on my phone. It’s 5:45 am, fifteen minutes before my set alarm, but I already know who the message's sender is. Madam Z is an insomniac and most days is found watching the sunrise at the nearby beach amongst the hard-core joggers and dog walkers. She listened intently the day I revealed my love of the ocean because ever since then, she has sent me a beach photo (almost daily) that lights up my bleary eyes even on the coldest winter days.

I’m a great believer that people come, and people go from our lives and the connections you make may stay for a short time and others stay for a lifetime. It’s a natural organic process where sometimes we take a little from each of the friendships to fill our own sentimental bucket and each friendship has its own purpose.

Like Madam Z and her beachy shots, there is Madam M who is the most pragmatic of friends, always telling me like it is, or Madam V who challenges my thinking, while Madam H and S and B are the most empathetic of souls, with them I never swear or talk rubbish and its Madam G who has seen it all, the longest of friendships, over 33 years and is never one to judge.

‘Surround yourself with people who lift you up, lend you knowledge and help you learn from your mistakes.Raise your standards for your inner circle’ – Tony Robbins.

Growing up I was an only child for a long time and my mother often remarks on my penchant for human connections. Wasn’t the saying that ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ or that ‘a person cannot truly survive on their own?’ Mum claims I was always looking for someone to play with and would quickly convert the neighbourhood kids into my posse. As a teenager, my friends were my whole world and as a young adult, work friends were a necessity, not just to keep the many hours hunched over a computer interesting, but because the work friendships were vital for our success. 'A recent Gallup Poll has shown that having best friends at work is key to employee engagement and job success,' hence my love for Madam L.

The engagement factor is what I deem important. Over the weekend I attended the funeral of one of my mother's closest friends. While distance and geography kept them apart, their friendship lasted more than forty years and they were still engaged in each other's lives. When Mum told me the saddest thing about losing her is ‘never hearing her voice again’, it signified just how quick life flashes us by. Memories of them throwing their heads back and hearing them laugh, clutching their bellies, came flooding back.

So, a shout out to my friends, past and present. I hope I have contributed to your ‘friendship’ well. I may not always call or text, send homing pigeons or fax, but when I’m present; I’m present, just like Madam Z and her wellness sunrises that remind me never to take anyone or the joy of a stroll along the beach for granted again.